I had a brilliant day yesterday completing the (nearly) 40k course at Cycletta South, and thought I would share some of my observations and great wisdom with you. See, now I’ve done my first 40k RACE I am now a proper athlete and such, and I even have a tiny medal to prove it.
- Say what you like about safety, but the number one use of a bicycle bell is to ping at small children who are waving at you. They LOVE it.
- When event organisers say ’40k ride’ along with the words ‘you can even do it on a Pashley’, bear in mind that if you DO cycle on a sit up and beg, everyone will be surprised you didn’t die on the way round.
- Hills are a bitch.
- Headwinds are a bitch.
- Headwinds and hills will make you think you are about to die – you probably won’t, but it will be close.
- You burn calories doing long cycle rides, but you can’t count them all if you hit the flapjacks at the feed station.
- Do not greet male cyclists in a friendly way by dinging your bell at them, whilst sticking your tongue out in concentration so you don’t fall off your bike. It looks a little like you’re trying to sexually harass them.
- Bison Hill should be renamed Bitching Hill, because that’s all I did on the way up.
- Wet wipes are your friend when you’ve finished.
- Once you’ve got past that finish line, you’ll feel like the Queen of the Universe!
Stay tuned for a proper write up of the day later!